If you’ve ever wondered how to get your kid to love wrestling, I’m here to help. 

Now, it might not seem like I’m the best person to write an article on how to get your kids to love wrestling, because I fell in love with it the moment I walked onto the mat at my first wrestling practice at the age of 6. I’ve never not loved wrestling — that being said, my parents have done some really key things that have definitely contributed to my enjoyment and commitment to not only the sport of wrestling, but how I approach the training as well. 

But I don’t expect you to just take my word for it. I’ve taken the time to ask some people who have a lot to contribute to the topic, and here’s their best advice on how to get your kids to love wrestling.

1. Introduce them to your favorite part

Most wrestlers are naturally drawn to certain areas of the sport. An example of this can be seen in Division III All-American at Rochester Institute, Illias Diakomihalis, the father of two-time NCAA champion Yianni Diakomihalis. 

As you may guess from watching him compete, Yianni’s upbringing in the sport of wrestling is extremely unique. Illias saw wrestling differently from most coaches and parents; he viewed it as more of an art to be mastered. From a young age, Yianni and his teammates developed a passion for learning new skills to perfect their art. Illias really enjoyed spending time watching film of Eastern European wrestlers on YouTube. With hopes that they could reach the top level of the sport, Illias was able to pass this passion on to his sons and the wrestlers he coached by watching with them and telling them about the things he noticed and appreciated.

“The biggest reason I love(d) the sport so much was because of how we viewed the sport. We always looked at it as an art/skill, so it was fun to learn new skills and improve.” -Yianni D.

2. Don’t let competition take control of their motivation

“When parents talk about competition, it’s negatively correlated to performance and possibly correlated with anxiety and stress.” -Ben Askren on Wrestling Changed My Life

Olympic level athletes train two to three times a day. They compete about once a month. That’s about 75 workouts between competitions. These wrestlers do not wrestle for the outcomes of tournaments. They don’t train their hardest for the accolades or medals. And while, of course, they have goals of winning, top-level wrestlers truly love every bit of the 75 workouts they do between competitions. It needs to be the same on the youth level. John Strittmatter, a coach at a top club in the country, Young Guns, had this to say on the topic: 

“Part of the journey a parent/coach has to go on is teaching your athletes to fall in love with training and getting better. A couple of years ago, Tervel Dlagnev (the Ohio RTC head coach) came in for a camp. He said that [success] is going to be all about the process of getting better. If you train for a whole year to become a state champion, but let’s say you come up a little short. Does that mean that you shouldn’t celebrate the whole year and all of the development that you’ve made? If you’re gonna do that, most people are going to live in the sport as miserable human beings. That’s not how it should be done. It should be the process being valued. It’s gotta be about mastery. Trying to get as close as you can to mastering your skills and your sport. Not results.”

Getting your kids to love practice takes effort on your part in that you can help find the right fit in a youth wrestling program. Age, practice partners, and coaches’ focus all play a part in how each wrestler will respond to the training, and since this is where they will spend most of the time that they are involved in the sport, it really matters that they walk out of practice with a feeling of satisfaction. They don’t necessarily need to think they had a blast, but they do need to feel like they did something worthwhile. 

3. Have them develop a favorite team and favorite wrestlers

If I had to describe my wrestling style, I would tell you that I focus mostly on technique. I credit my style to my coaches, but most of the skills I develop come from the countless matches I’ve watched on FloWrestling. Believe it or not, being a fan of the higher levels of wrestling greatly benefits my own wrestling. I’ve learned countless lessons from my favorite wrestlers and had a blast at the same time. 

An easy way to spark your wrestler’s interest in this is just like all other sports: help them find their favorite team and athletes. I don’t know a single family who doesn’t have a favorite NFL or college football team, even if no one in the family plays football! They learn the game of football by watching those favorite teams and players do what they do best. Take the same concept and apply it to wrestling. For the longest time, I loved watching Nathan Tomasello from Ohio State. His lefty high-crotches were (and still are) a thing of beauty. As I watched Nate wrestle more and more, my focus on my lefty high crotch increased greatly. Not only that, but I connected entertainment (watching Nathan Tomasello) with the sport of wrestling! 

4. Take them to events if at all possible — if not, watch online

I have spent a good number of weeknights sitting in the stands of my favorite high school’s gym watching the wrestling team take on the local rivals. My first national event that I did not compete in was the 2019 Southern Scuffle. As many of you know, this event was a breakthrough for my passion for wrestling. In my first years of wrestling, I constantly researched wrestlers, their techniques, their mentalities, and the story of their careers. This foundation of knowledge was critical for my experience at the Scuffle. 

It behooves young athletes to witness their role models at work in person and through the TV screen. It causes them to imagine themselves wrestling in those big shoes one day. The fun atmosphere at higher-level events is not only an experience to remember for the kids, but it also lights up a clear path of where they dream to be one day. Doug Schwab, head coach at UNI, said the following:

“Getting it to come from them and be their idea is very important; you can direct and guide but not push. The sport makes you give up too much comfort to force it on them. Get them to events, get them around the guys, and get them being a fan so they can get that imagination running.”

5. Understand that it’s not always flowers and rainbows

As you may have noticed so far, this article has mainly been pushing being “softer” on your kids. While you do need to keep it light and fun, a huge aspect of a true passion is to have them experience struggles and adversity. Wrestling is not an easy sport. In my conversation with Yianni, we covered this a little bit. He said, “Show them the beauty of the sport first, then get tough.”

Your kid needs to understand that success isn’t easily achievable. Success in any area of life isn’t easily achievable. If it was, it wouldn’t be worth much. Hard things should be looked at as opportunities to overcome, not circumstances to endure — or worse, find a way to get out of.

6. Find a balance in winning and losing

An easy way to build this kind of balance is to keep their results under control. When they start wrestling, keep them local. As they start to have more success within your local town or county, move to the rest of your state. And as they find success in your state, start competing at regional and national events. When you are able to control the results, the highs aren’t too high and the lows aren’t too low. 

One of the most successful club coaches in Tennessee, Josh Bosken, said, “All sports are great for kids. Wrestling is just different. But I tell all my parents this: ‘This is a long time journey. Your kids will win, your kids will lose . . . but they will get to own all the results they get.’ The biggest reason kids are not in the sport long-term is because parents are more worried about the results than the kids are. If I had to provide a ‘secret sauce’ for any parent getting their kid involved in the sport it would be this: 

• Get them involved early
• Focus on fun and technical development 
• Around 5th/6th grade seek out tougher competition
• Drop them off at practice and leave 
• Understand your baby isn’t going to win every match
• Be tough on them (effort and attitude)
• Let it be their journey.

One of the most notable recurring themes I have recognized in all of the interviews I have conducted over the past year is how much the sport of wrestling gives back to those who are willing to give it their best. This theme is not dependent on how far the sport took them or how many accolades it brought them. Whether they never made it past JV or they have Olympic gold medals hanging on their walls, the gifts of fortitude, courage, and ability to overcome adversity are all given freely to those who would love and commit to wrestling. In that way, helping your kids to love wrestling is a great parenting move. It's the gift that keeps on giving.

Sam Herring is a 13-year-old wrestler from Memphis, Tennessee. He is the co-founder of a wrestling media organization called Home Mat Advantage, which runs articles, a regular podcast, and much more. Additionally, Sam has helped FloWrestling with commentating at events like the Southern Scuffle and Who's #1.